How To Make Your Relationship More Fun: Expert-Backed Tips
Discover actionable ways to rekindle joy and excitement in your relationship, as recommended by relationship coaches and therapists.
All relationships ebb and flow between comfort and excitement, but if you’ve noticed more routine than joy with your partner lately, injecting fun can be transformative. Relationship experts agree: refresh your bond with intentional strategies that foster laughter, connection, and adventure — no matter how long you’ve been together. Here’s a comprehensive, expert-guided roadmap to making your relationship more fun, vibrant, and memorable.
Why Fun Matters in Long-Term Relationships
It’s easy for any partnership to slip into predictable routines over time. While consistency builds trust, too much sameness can breed boredom and emotional distance. Fun is the antidote, helping couples:
- Reignite attraction and flirtation
- Reduce stress through laughter and play
- Deepen intimacy by creating positive shared experiences
- Build new memories and highlight what makes your connection unique
Ready to make your relationship more fun? Explore these actionable suggestions, each grounded in expert advice and real-life examples.
1. Surprise Each Other
Routine is comforting, but it can dull the spark that made your partnership thrilling initially. According to dating coach Shawnda Patterson, “Routines can kill even the most loving relationships and make them feel boring. Bring back the spontaneity.”
- Plan a surprise date night. Take turns organizing the outing and keep the plan secret until the last minute.
- Spontaneously bring your partner’s favorite snack or coffee.
- Write a short note or card and hide it in their bag or jacket.
These surprises don’t need to be extravagant — the key is novelty and thoughtfulness.
2. Try a New Activity Together
Doing something new as a couple stimulates excitement and can strengthen your bond. Therapists recommend activities outside your comfort zone, whether it’s trying a new type of cuisine, embarking on a pottery class, or going rock climbing.
- Pick an unusual hobby to sample together (e.g., ballroom dancing, archery, improv theater).
- Attend local events or workshops neither of you have tried before.
- Take turns suggesting new experiences, framing them as team adventures rather than critiques of your current routine.
As clinical psychologist Dr. Sarah Williams notes, addressing boredom should be positive: “Instead of blatantly telling your partner that you are bored, suggest trying something new together for shared fun.”
3. Give Yourself Some Phone-Free Time
Modern relationships often battle digital distractions. To encourage genuine connection, agree to device-free periods where you fully focus on each other. David Brudö, a mental wellbeing expert, explains: “Mobile phones can have a negative impact on our attention span, as well as our ability to open up and communicate with others.”
- Have a phone-free dinner or date night each week.
- Establish tech-free hours at home, such as the first hour after work or before bed.
Even short periods of undivided attention can help you rediscover your partner in new ways.
4. Flirt More (Yes, Even After Years Together!)
Certified relationship coach Chris Armstrong observes, “Couples who stop flirting are couples who stop anticipating.” Flirting injects spontaneity and reminds you both of the early-stage excitement that brought you together.
- Send romantic or playful text messages during the day.
- Compliment each other on looks, wit, or small achievements.
- Kiss hello and goodbye, or share affectionate touch in public and private.
While it may initially feel awkward if you’ve fallen out of the habit, playful flirtation can reignite intimacy and anticipation in your relationship.
5. Goof Off and Be Silly
According to sex coach Amy Levine, when couples reach a ‘secure’ status, they sometimes lose the playfulness that first attracted them. If you haven’t let yourself act silly in a while, it’s time to tap into that childlike joy once more.
- Have an at-home dance party or karaoke night.
- Make up silly games or inside jokes.
- Imitate characters from your favorite movies or TV shows.
Relationship coach Jonathan Bennett adds, “Give yourself permission to be silly — it’s easy to take relationships way too seriously.”
6. Travel Together (or Change Your Scenery)
Taking trips, big or small, can inject novelty and adventure into your relationship. Relationship expert Miyoko Rifkin says, “Changing your environment will help create new emotional responses to your partner, instead of triggering old undesirable ones.”
- Take a spontaneous road trip to a nearby town or nature area.
- Book a weekend getaway, even if it’s just a staycation in your own city.
- Explore a new neighborhood or restaurant you’ve never visited before.
The aim is to break free of familiar context and experience one another with fresh eyes.
7. Come Up With a Couples Bucket List
Therapist Kimberly Hershenson suggests crafting a shared bucket list as a source of inspiration when you feel stuck.
- Brainstorm adventurous and light-hearted activities you both want to try, from skydiving to starting a book club for two.
- Write your ideas down, decorate your list, and post it someplace visible.
- When you’re bored, pick an item and make it your new mini-mission!
Checking off these goals together gives you both something to look forward to and builds a library of shared memories.
8. Play Connection Games and Ask Deep Questions
Playful games and deep-question sessions build intimacy and foster laughter. For example, consider “36 Questions That Lead To Love,” a question set designed to help people connect more deeply.
- Ask each other quirky or hypothetical questions like, “If you could live in any era, which would you choose?”
- Turn it into a game night or a tradition for special evenings.
When you swap stories and confessions, you rediscover the unique individuals at the heart of your relationship.
9. Bring the World Home With Themed Date Nights
Switch up your regular routine with creative, themed date nights. Subscription services like Try The World provide culinary adventures at home, but you can also DIY.
- Pick a country and cook its cuisine together, watch a related film, and curate a matching playlist.
- Dress in themed outfits or decorate your dining area to match the destination.
- Rotate who chooses the country or theme each month.
These nights offer fun, cultural exploration, and a break from the usual.
10. Watch a Sexy Movie
Sometimes, injecting sensuality and fun is as easy as dimming the lights and watching a romantic or sexy movie together. Light candles, bring snacks, and let one thing lead to another — or simply enjoy the shared experience of something new and tantalizing.
11. Make Video Games Part of Date Night
Adding a dose of competition can freshen the dynamic and spark playful rivalry. Visit a local arcade or challenge each other to at-home video games.
- Make friendly bets (e.g., winner picks the next date night).
- Try new or nostalgia-inducing co-op or versus games that are easy for both to play.
Not a gamer? Board games, card games, or trivia nights work just as well.
12. Fun Questions & Tests for Each Other
Use downtime to ask fun questions or test how much you know about one another. This sparks conversation, laughter, and sometimes surprising discoveries.
- Try out party game questions (e.g., “What would you do if you won the lottery?”)
- Quiz each other on preferences (“What’s my favorite way to relax?”)
Keep it light-hearted and enjoy learning new things about your partner.
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)
Q: How do I suggest adding more fun to my relationship without offending my partner?
Frame it as a team effort. Suggest wanting to try something new together rather than focusing on what’s lacking. Communicate excitement, not criticism.
Q: What if my partner and I have different interests — how do we find activities we both enjoy?
Start by each making a list of fun activities, then compare for overlap. Be open to trying new things for each other, or alternate picking activities so both feel involved and valued.
Q: We’re really busy… how can we fit more fun into our schedule?
Look for small opportunities: a shared walk, phone-free meals, or even 10-minute silly games before bed. Consistency is more impactful than duration — daily playfulness counts, even if brief.
Q: Does being silly or goofy risk undermining respect in a relationship?
Not at all. Playfulness usually strengthens respect and admiration by showing trust and vulnerability. Just make sure to keep it mutual and considerate.
Additional Expert-Recommended Tips
- Celebrate ‘just because’—give small gifts or plan dates without needing a special occasion.
- Try a new restaurant every month to shake up your routine.
- Lay in bed together and just talk, touch, or daydream.
- Share goals and dreams over coffee or during walks.
| Fun Idea | Why It Works | How to Start |
|---|---|---|
| Surprise Date Night | Sparks novelty and anticipation | Alternate planning and keep it secret until date time |
| Shared Bucket List | Builds long-term excitement & goals | Write down and display your bucket list somewhere visible |
| Themed At-Home Night | Boosts creativity and cultural curiosity | Pick a country or theme, and plan food, music, and activities around it |
| Flirty Challenges | Revives playful intimacy | Send a flirty message or challenge your partner each day this week |
| Unplugged Hour | Increases presence and emotional connection | Agree on a daily or weekly time to put away all devices |
Final Thoughts
Fun in relationships isn’t just an extra — it’s essential for growth, connection, and lasting fulfillment. The most successful couples make a habit of injecting playfulness, curiosity, and shared adventure into their routines. By experimenting with these expert-backed ideas, you’ll create new traditions, shared laughs, and an ever-deepening partnership. Remember, the best relationships aren’t always the most serious — they’re often the most joyful and alive.
References
- https://www.bustle.com/p/how-to-make-your-relationship-more-fun-according-to-experts-7834336
- https://www.bustle.com/articles/120702-9-unique-ways-to-bring-fun-back-into-a-relationship
- https://dennababul.com/50-questions-to-ask-your-partner-when-youre-bored-out-of-your-mind/
- https://www.onlinetherapynyc.com/blog/2018/8/10/featured-in-bustle-11-seemingly-innocent-habits-that-can-sabotage-a-new-relationship-before-it-starts
- https://www.heatheredwardsnyc.com/relationships/
- https://mindstudio.com.ng/7-underrated-ways-to-make-your-boring-relationship-feel-exciting-again
- https://www.bustle.com/crush-week-2025
- https://www.sdrelationshipplace.com/18-early-signs-your-partner-is-the-one-as-seen-in-bustle/
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